you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Randomize
