the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
ttyl tear gas
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
