I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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