Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Randomize
