Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I think my vagina is haunted
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
