Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
