Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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