office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
