they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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