Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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