ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Alive.
So much puke
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
