Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
