I wannas sexs uuuuu
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize