I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
