we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Randomize
