After last night, I could never be a politician.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
