we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
