ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
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