He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
