I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Need sex. Gaining weight.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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