Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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