ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
