This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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