her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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