The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
