AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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