we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
