I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
