i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
