Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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