There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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