Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
