no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
It's rum buckets o'clock
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
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