i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
