I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
FUCK WHALES
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
