So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Randomize
