It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
