Dual....:-)
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
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