Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
