Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
