The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
