You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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