if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
