so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
