Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
