READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
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