It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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