I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Randomize
