normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Randomize
