yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
