Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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