i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
